1. you look great.
2. just breastfeed, the weight will come right off....ka-wrong again...i weigh 3 MORE pounds than i did three weeks ago.
3. just rub lotion on yourself and you won't get stretch marks...ka-wrong again... i used lotion everyday and i will never wear shorts or a two piece again. i'm saving up for a one piece with skirt.
4. oh a c-section will be easy...you'll be fine.
i'm not bitter...just thinking of joining "The Biggest Loser" season 10! Still carrying around 20+ extra pounds, but not to worry cuz i have a plan!
so, it's been a whole 2 months since my sweet baby boy was born and we are having so much fun. he's starting to coo alot and smile and even giggle every once in a while. it's hard to catch those sweet moments on camera, though. i don't EVER want to go back to work and leave my baby boy, and i am EXTREMELY jealous that his daddy gets to stay home with him! i still have four more weeks to spend all day with him though. maternity leave in america is a joke, but that's a rant for another day...
i'm going to back track a little...i can't believe it's been 2 months since cannon's birth....i do wish i had recorded more facts as i went along. i've got to get on that baby book, too. my mom is always saying, "write this down so you won't forget b/c i sure have."
As much as i had rather him not come on Christmas Day, he sure enough did! and now i wouldn't have it any other way b/c that makes his birthday extra special. i guess if he has to share his birthday with anybody, it might as well be Jesus!! though some will argue (namely my husband) that Jesus wasn't born on December 25 at all...anywho....
So, about three weeks before cannon was born i was not feeling so hot at all! i did not think i was going to make it to my due date, nor did anyone at work. they actually had a betting pool going as to when he was coming! don't think i didn't try to get in on that action. i bet the 26th...so close! Month 8 was a rough one...rougher than month 9 in my opinion. but that passed and i kept showing up to work, and people kept saying, "you're still here?" "haven't had that baby yet?" blah blah...you know. well, about 10 days before he got here, i started having braxton hicks contractions very consistently (i had been having them for a long time, but they just got consistent). every 15 minutes like clockwork. i started to think i'm going to have this baby anyday now! i really wanted to make it til christmas vacation, though. lord knows i did not want to go into labor at school! that went on for about a week and 3 days before Christmas (aka cannon's birthday) i started having REAL contractions. at first i thought i just had to go to the bathroom. you know that crampy constipated feeling. ha. i made chris time the contractions, but they weren't consistent and they subsided. this went on for the next 2 nights. wednesday night 9the 23rd) they were more consistent, but still not the "real thing." finally thursday, Christmas Eve, around 4 in the afternoon they started coming closer together. i knew for sure that i was having this baby soon! so the WHOLE family was already coming over for Christmas Eve dinner. my family and chris's family. i knew i better eat up b/c i heard they won't let you eat at the hospital when you're in labor. only those d^&% ice chips! so i ate everything i could and two desserts.
i was thinking these contractions aren't so bad i can handle this. i would just kinda cringe until it passed. definitely uncomfortable, but not unbearable. definitely not a time i won't someone rubbing my belly like chris's mom asked to do right in the middle of a contraction! so i started sitting on my "birthing ball" aka the same thing as an exercise ball that i purchased earlier in the week b/c i read that it helps. well, it helps with those early contractions yes. 7 cm is a different story where no stupid ball is helping except to throw at the people who want to touch me.
so 10pm i'm going to try to get some sleep b/c i'm thinking tomorrow i am having a baby...baby yes, sleep no. the contractions started coming closer together and lasting longer. chris still wasn't convinced that this was "it" after three days of contractions. he made me the sock with the rice that you put in the microwave. he rubbed my back and helped as much as he could by rubbing my back and pressing hard. my goal was to stay at home as long as i could. after every contraction i would have to go to the bathroom. at 1:00 we called the midwife. yes, sounds like you are in labor. i would guess 3 cm at this point. i lasted about another hour and then i had to go.
the car ride was NOT fun. especially since chris was driving and could rub my back. i was moaning and groaning and carrying on and chris was calling people to say we were on the way to the hospital and that he was fairly certain this was the real deal. excuse me? fairly certain? ok ok certain. no fairly. luckily there was zero traffic at 2 am on christmas morning, but it was raining.
we made it to the hospital and again not a soul... i later learned that one poor lady did not make it to the hospital and ended up having her baby in the car in the parking lot at the hospital!
i was already dilated 5 cm at this point and beginning to think i am not going to make it to 10!!! I was trying really hard to focus and breath, but the contractions at 5 cm were ALOT different than the contractions at 2! so i moaned and groaned for about 3 more hours until the contractions were coming so fast and hard i just physically could not take it anymore. i was shaking and exhausted. i had made it to 7 cm though!
i got the epidural. well, i waited for the epidural guy to get there first. they sure do take their sweet precious time! oh and you have to be still when they put that thing in. kinda hard to do if you're having a contraction. but i did it. i prayed really hard. this is what they tell you. you will feel the first contraction. the second one will be less evident. and you shouldn't feel it by the time you get to the third one. wrong. i still felt it. i was crying. i thought you weren't supposed to feel it. why do i feel it? i wouldn't have got it if i could still feel it. tears. finally kicked in. really kicked in. couldn't feel a THING.
thought i would take a nap. nope. shaking. shivering. 2 more hours passed. time to start pushing. looks like we'll have a baby here in about an hour or so. 7 am. push. i am pushing. no you're not. push harder. i can't feel anything. i don't know if i'm pushing or not. push. throw up. throw up. no water. only ice chips. push. push. push. the baby hasn't "dropped" yet. i didn't know this, but you have to get from 0 to 4 and i was only at zero. i pushed and pushed and pushed. still not good enough. turn the epidural down. didn't know you could do that. well once you turn it down apparently you can't turn it back up cuz i felt it. i pushed for 2 hours and guess what? still at zero!! i am crying and crying. i can't even hold my legs up. the midwives and nurses start to whisper. i know what they are going to say....c-section. failure to descend is what they call it. his head is too big and my pelvis is too small. on the inside. my pelvis is plenty big on the outside.
more epidural. hurry up. i can feel it. i'm watching my contractions on the contraction monitoring screen. those things were spiking up really high and lasting really long. lots of epidural. i have to be numb up to my chest for the surgery. the major surgery. people talk about c-sections so casually like it's nothing. well, it's something. finally numb. maybe too numb. my hands start to feel tingly too.
9:53 am. he's here!! 7 pounds 7 ounces! so tiny. so beautiful. so perfect.
1 comment:
love the honesty in your post...so true!
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